Lyme Less & Love Your Body More!

Good afternoon!!

Again, I cannot thank you all enough for all your support! It has truly amazed me! My blog is being shared all around the world and I'm so grateful for this! So thank you, thank you!!

My last post was about hoping being a part of healing. Which we all know that without hope, we can never heal. (In any situation).

I've been sitting here contemplating on what to write today... And for some reason, I feel like I just need to talk about how Lyme makes you feel. Not only physically, but mentally. Lyme is a very challenging disease. Physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. Some days you feel like you can almost conquer the world. Other days, getting out of bed is a major achievement. Like today for instance, I'm still in my pj's laying on the couch with zero motivation to do anything. I'm beyond exhausted, my body aches terribly, I'm dizzy, burning up, etc and right now, I don't even care. If someone were to walk in, they'd just witness a "couch potato". It's been a pretty rough weekend for the most part. Some of it may be due to a slight splurge in my diet, which if it was, it was sooo not worth it. So this brings me to loving your body.

Throughout the years of being ill, there have been some very emotional times. Times where you really over think every single thing no matter what and your emotions are all over the place. You feel worthless, helpless, useless, etc. These thoughts are completely normal with Lyme Disease. (And others as well). Lyme really effects EVERYTHING in your life. Going from one extreme to the next can really do a toll on your mind and body. People can get to a really low point in their life and truly let themselves go. And I'm not ashamed to say, I've been there. At times, I can still feel myself slowly going back that direction, but I can't. I won't. I've come to learn that throughout this whole experience, my faith and hope have become so tried, but so much stronger.

Back to loving your body - with Lyme, diet plays a huge role. There are some very strict diets for people with Lyme to help reverse it. No sugars, grains, wheat, gluten, soy, dairy, red meat, processed foods... Growing up in an environment where we basically ate these things constantly, not knowing what they did, to now, is a huge lifestyle change. HUGE. However, I can honestly say that treating your body right and only nourishing it with the purest and healthiest of foods can only increase your healing process. And treating your body right, doesn't mean just feeding it right.. It means loving your body, loving yourself. No matter what's been placed in our paths and how much we feel useless, worthless, or feel like you can't do anything, you HAVE to keep loving yourself!

Just recently I have received an amazing priesthood blessing from my incredible husband. The spirit was so strong and there were words that stuck to me like glue. And I knew it was coming from our Heavenly Father. The blessing was very sacred and special to me so I won't share word for word, but I'll give a comparison. Basically, the blessing was that I couldn't help anyone beyond what I've helped myself. I've been pondering this since. Helping people in life is one of my passions. I want to help people heal. I want people to know they are loved and there is always hope. Because of everything I have gone through, loving myself wasn't exactly my forte or my priority. I would get to a place where I truly felt worthless, fear the future and not focus on faith or hope. At the time, I didn't realize what damage this was doing to not only my mind, but my body. The more I had these thoughts, the worse I felt. Yes, I can blame Lyme all I want on how it's made me feel over the years, OR I can change my life by knowing that even though I still have really hard days and can't get off the couch, I don't have to think negatively about myself or the disease. Of course I don't like the disease and what it has done, but I keep my faith and hope knowing that not every single day is the same. Slowly, I am getting better and some days it feels like I took 10 steps backwards. It's a very, very long process, but it can't let you get to the point where you give up. It's okay to have a bad day, or two bad days, or even 10! I've missed out on so many family functions, church meetings, just going to church and activities, and if I think about all I have missed, I get super down and feel awful. I'm sure most people who suffer from illnesses/diseases feel the same way. I'm here to tell you it's okay if you aren't always able to do or give 100% of yourself all the time. Healing is a process. Sometimes faster for some than others. But you will get there and it will be worth it. These trials are temporary and will not always be there. Keep your heads up, focus on faith and hope. And lastly, LOVE YOURSELVES!! I challenge everyone of you, sick or not, to look in the mirror every morning and say "I love you" & "I accept you". This may sound funny to some of you, but do this for at least 21 days and see what happens.

Thank you all again so much for the love and support! Remember to keep your faith and hopes high and to keep loving yourself along the way.

~Nicole~

Lyme: Hoping Is Part Of Healing

Happy Friday!!

*****I've added this little video for some background music cause I LOVE this song! Please enjoy it while reading this post :)

I can't believe how much love my blog has been getting! I feel so overwhelmed and full of gratitude for this. My goal is to reach out to others and give them hope. And I feel like it's starting to happen! So thank you all for that!!

After I had created my group on FB, I've talked with some wonderful people! All kinds of people. Most of them with Lyme, but some with other chronic health issues and it has truly made me realize some things. It made me realize a couple things about Lyme that I feel needs to be shared. And this just doesn't have to apply to Lyme Disease either. This can apply to life in general.

Some of the MOST crucial points when having Lyme are, you have to WANT to be better. You have to KNOW you can do it. You have to CHANGE your way of LIFE and your way of THINKING. If you don't want it, don't feel you can do it or constantly negative, it will not happen. You will not get better. I am not saying this to offend anyone, so please don't think that :) I'm saying this because it's true and it's from personal experience. Our attitudes have so much to do with our journey here on earth. If we want to be healed and have hope, it will be worth it and it will amaze you what you will learn throughout your journey.

Years ago when I was constantly getting sick and seeing many different Doctors, I started getting frustrated, angry, bitter, etc. I could not understand why Doctors could not help me. The one person who is supposed to help you when you're sick, couldn't help me. And it wasn't just one Doctor. It was several after several. I remember I started becoming negative, not always out loud, but in my mind. I'd have thoughts of never getting better, never knowing what was really wrong with me or if it was maybe just all in my mind. Part of me at times thought maybe I was going crazy. But deep down I knew this wasn't right. There were nights I would lie in bed crying so hard I couldn't breathe. And I would pray to our Heavenly Father for peace and comfort. I would pray that I would wake up the next morning. And guess what? I would. No matter how miserable I felt the night before or how much crying I had done or how angry I was, I would always wake up the next day. That alone gave me hope. Don't get me wrong, this journey is a real struggle most days. But after years of going through what I had, to learning all about natural/holistic treatments and healing, I have more hope and faith now than ever before.

There comes a point in our lives when we are suffering and we wonder why we have to deal with this. Why us? If  we are constantly thinking the negative and asking why me, it's time to switch our thinking to better our lives. Instead of asking why me or feeling like a victim, ask questions like, "What am I to learn from these trials?" I know this can be very hard to switch the way you think, but it can also be very simple and life changing. I've been there before and have personally experienced some of the most incredible blessings and changes in my life.

If we go to bed thinking negative thoughts like, "Oh great, tomorrow is going to be another crappy day", "I'm going to feel terrible tomorrow", "nothing will be different", or "I'm never going to get better"... Surprise!! You are correct. What we think is what we get. It's called the Law of Attraction. People need to be more aware of their thoughts and actions. Negative thoughts brings negativity. Positive thoughts bring more positive. Some of you may wonder what this has to do with healing Lyme. Well, it actually has to do a lot. Thinking that you'll never get better will do nothing for you, but make you feel worse. If we strive to have hope, faith and be positive about our healing, you'll see a world of difference. I can promise you this. I won't lie, there are times where I still struggle. There are some days when I just can't do it. I can't take it. But I have to remember to change my way of thinking and not get stuck in those thoughts because I have to look at how far I've come already. I may not be where I want to be physically, but I know that having faith in my Heavenly Father, my Savior, and being positive, I can overcome anything.

Everyone has been given a divine plan and purpose on this earth. Whether we wan't to believe it or not, I testify that this is true. I know part of my plan was to have Lyme and all these other illnesses for a reason. Some of those reasons are to help others. I've not only learned things for myself as to why I've been dealt the trials and tribulations I have, but I've learned that most of my trials are for other people. Without Lyme and all the other health problems I've had, I would not be where I am today. I wouldn't have found my true passion in life to help heal others, to become a Foot Zoner, to love energy work, be married to the most amazing husband in the entire world and I wouldn't have come to love Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ the way I do now. My love for them is beyond words.My faith has grown so much and it has strengthened me in many, many ways. Knowing that no matter the struggle or no matter how hard my day is, I have someone there for me always. I know I still have a long road ahead of me, but I also know there are blessings in store and I won't stop fighting. I hope and pray for all of you who suffer from anything can find that hope is part of healing. Without hope, what do we have? Nothing. Stay positive, be grateful always and remember where there is hope, there is a way.

Things to Remember:
*Create a positive environment
*Use affirmations in your healing process: "I am healing", "I can overcome _____", "I am strong"
*Find support groups (Like my blog and FB page;))
*Let people around you be aware of what you are going through
*Pray Pray Pray - You are loved and you are heard. You are never alone and our nobody understands    better than our Savior.
*Keep your faith
*Never lose hope

~Thanks again to all of you who are following and being a part of my journey ~

Nicole

The Truth About Lyme

Good afternoon :)

Today is one of those days where I just wish I had my mom here. Yes I am almost 26 and that probably sounds silly to some of you. But today the Lyme is totally kicking my butt and there is something about having your mom around when you're sick ;)

I've recently been in contact with quite a few people with Lyme Disease and have had some great conversations. I've been asked to talk/discuss more about Lyme on my blog. So here it goes. I'm just going to lay out the truth about Lyme.

Let's face it. Lyme is miserable. IT. SUCKS.  For those of you who have it, know this to be more than true. Not saying it is worse than anything else in the world, but it feels that way at times. There can be good times, bad times and really bad times with Lyme. And yes, it can be fatal. Lyme has been overlooked for so many years and people need to learn more about it and be aware of it. People who have Lyme have suffered for months and even years before even being diagnosed with it. Some Dr.'s even call it an Epidemic. That's scary. An epidemic that is highly overlooked and misdiagnosed constantly.

Lyme originally was found back East in Connecticut (in 1975). So what does this mean for people in other parts of the world? It means that most Dr.'s and some people believe Lyme cannot be found in anyone else who isn't back East or who hasn't traveled to another country. Well guess what? This is a bunch of b.s. Whether you want to believe it or not, Lyme can be found basically anywhere. And when your Dr. does decide to test for it and most tests come back negative, they misdiagnose it as another disease/illness. (Such as Multiple Sclerosis, Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, Chronic Fatigue, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Chronic Sinus Infection, and the list goes on.) But guess what else? Lyme can actually hide. Yes, hide. Obviously if they can hide, some tests will appear negative and patients will continue to be treated for the wrong illness. And if they do come back positive, Dr.'s will want to treat you with heavy antibiotics. Some of you may know that antibiotics for long periods of time can ruin your body. Also, newsflash, antibiotics can only work within the first 7-10 days of getting Lyme. Most people aren't diagnosed for months or years, so clearly, antibiotics will not work. If you get treated with antibiotics, your body will eventually become immune to them anyways. So hundreds to thousands of dollars later, there you are, still suffering from Lyme and wasted a lot of money.

When Lyme was first found, it was linked to a Deer Tick bite. Most of you probably know that this is what causes Lyme. However, this isn't true either. Lyme Disease can be linked to ticks, mosquitoes, deer flies, spiders, etc. Many people are highly unaware of this. It's really important that people know this and people become more open about Lyme Disease because there is so much that needs to be told.

So- here is a small portion of the truth about Lyme.

Through my journey, I have done hours and hours of research, talked to many different people, read books, etc. I know a lot of people are into conventional/modern medicine. And don't get me wrong, I think it's great and the world has come a long way with today's medicine. However, not when it comes to Lyme. I'm not writing this to bash on Dr.'s or today's medicine at all, because it was all created from good intention and has helped so many people. Lyme is a different story. And in my opinion, along with my experience and experience of people I know, holistic, alternative and natural treatments are THE best way to go. Without it, I probably wouldn't even be here today. It's been a saving grace.

I will continue to discuss more about Lyme in my blogs and help reach out to people. Even though Lyme sucks and can be extremely hard, there is hope. And everyone should know this. Lyme can be cured. It takes a lot of faith, hope, knowledge, strength and positive attitude in the healing process. Because the process doesn't just happen over night. It can take years. But years is better than never.

I know that I have been dealt these trials in my life for a reason. Whether it's to strengthen my faith, others faith or to help others find hope, it's my trial and I will make the best of it. I know my Heavenly Father loves me and trusts me to enough to have this trial. It's been extremely hard at times and there have been times where I felt like I wasn't going to make it, but I did. I hope and pray for each and everyone of you who suffer from Lyme or any other illness. But I also want you all to know you can never lose hope. Ever. Sometimes we don't know why we go through the things we do, but we have to stay positive and do the best we can, even if doing the best sometimes is not being able to get out of bed.

I hope you will all continue to share my blog and keep reading! I appreciate all the support I have been given and all the wonderful messages! I absolutely love them! Have a wonderful day everyone!

P.S. I was inspired to create a group for Lyme Disease on Facebook. For those of you who need support or want to learn about holistic healing for Lyme, please join us! The group is called - *All About Lyme - Holistic Healing*

Throwin' it back to my wedding day!

Good afternoon everybody! I decided I need to get this blog updated. It has been too long! I have so many topics to start writing about and can't wait to share them with all of you! However, since I just recently got married, I would love to share my experience with you all and blog about that today! :)

May 15, 2014. Best. Day. Of. My. Entire. Life. I married my best friend. It was the most beautiful day!

Photo by: Katie Evans

As you all know, I've suffered from major diseases and illnesses. Preparing for the BIG day was stressful. The whole planning and everything wasn't the stressful part. I was so sick and I was so stressed out about not feeling better by the time of my wedding. About a week before, as I posted in a previous update, I received a blessing from my Branch President. Leading up to the wedding, I kept trying to remain calm and not stress because all it would do is make me feel worse. As the wedding day got closer, I just kept praying and kept having faith that everything would be fine. I had to keep remembering the blessing I received and the most comforting words that I was told. I knew as long as I trusted in the Lord and kept repeating that blessing in my mind, everything would be just fine.

As the wedding day approached, I woke up feeling awful. I only got a little over 3 hours of sleep. For those of you who don't know, having Lyme, MS or other illnesses, if you have little to no sleep, it literally feels like your body has been destroyed and there is hardly any functioning. I just kept telling myself I was calm and healthy and energetic. My sisters and I packed our stuff and headed to my friends hotel room to get ready there. As I was getting my hair done, I was struggling. My stomach was hurting, I was exhausted, no energy and just felt terrible. I finished getting ready and Nichelle (my sister) and I headed to the temple. I had a constant prayer in my mind and heart the whole time. I tried hard to ignore how I was feeling and focused on the exciting things. Like getting married!!

We arrived at the temple a liiiiittle bit late because the parking was a nightmare.. As I walked in and saw my future hubby sitting there, I immediately felt calm. I was so ready to marry him! We got to spend some time together then went our separate ways for a short while. My mom was with me helping me get ready. It was so peaceful.

The time came when Simon and I were ready to get sealed. It was such a wonderful experience! I thought for sure I would cry like a baby, but I didn't. I was just so happy and so excited to finally marry the man of my dreams, my best friend, my everything. I felt so grateful to be in the House of The Lord and sharing that wonderful experience with our loved ones.

As I was changing into my wedding dress to make my grand appearance, my heart was so full of joy, peace and so much gratitude. I was so thankful I was able to have this day happen. Even though I felt awful that whole morning and through most of the sealing, I didn't even care. My heart and mind were somewhere else and I knew that as long as I kept my faith in my blessing and the Lord, my wedding day would be perfect. It made me realize how crucial it is to maintain faith through anything in life. Trials or happiness, faith is always needed.

Simon and I came out of the temple and I'm pretty sure we were both just glowing! It was so wonderful to see all of our loved ones there to support us and help us celebrate our day. I was just so thankful!! We had all of our pictures taken by our amazing photographer, Katie Evans. We didn't spend super long taking pictures 'cause by that time, I was so exhausted and the 5 inch heels weren't helping, but boy were they stunna!

After we finished taking pics, Simon and I were starving so we decided to go get some grub... Yes, in our wedding attire, we went to Carl's Jr. and got food. I was craving fries so bad and it was close to our house so that's where we went.

~No judging~

We had a lovely reception later that evening at 6-8. It was everything we wanted. We had our reception in this super cute barn in Draper. We wanted the vintage, rustic theme and it was perfect!! We couldn't have done it without my sweet mother in-law. Because I was so sick through our engagement, she pretty much just took over and done just about everything! I feel so grateful to have such wonderful in-laws in my life!! They have been incredible and I will be forever grateful for all they have done.

 Photo by: Katie Evans

I am going to eventually post some photos, I'm just still waiting to get them!  I hope you guys enjoyed this little update and look forward to seeing all the beautiful pictures from our wedding day!!

I Need Thee Every Hour

Before I begin writing about what's been going on lately, I just want to say thank you so much to all of you who are following my blog and for all the amazing messages I have been receiving! I am so grateful for each and every one of you. This blog may be about my life and struggles, but the intention is to inspire others who are struggling to always look up.



Over the last week I have been started to feel better. YAY! Progress is being made! I think all the treatments and medicine is really starting to help. However, I also know that there has been a big change in me mentally and spiritually. Sometimes we can't seem to feel the spirit or have the greatest amount of faith possible, because we hit blockages. There are many different type of blockages that we get or face. Mostly, they are emotional blockages. These are things I learned a lot about during my Foot Zoning classes. It's amazing what they can do to a person. I know that my body had created a bunch of emotional and mental blockages due to the disease I have suffered with. Sometimes when we are struggling so much we can't seem to look past our trial and feel that overwhelming joy or peace that we love to feel. After visiting with my Branch President on Tuesday and receiving such an amazing blessing, something clicked. Even after all the foot zones, energy work and treatments I have had done, something else hit me.

The Hymn, "I Need Thee Every Hour" came to my mind during my blessing. I knew that everything had started to work but after that blessing, I felt like I was started to get those "good feelings" back. I was feeling a "shift" in my body. The shift I had been waiting for, for a long time.

I knew I needed to go to the temple. I have been wanting to go for so long, but I just never made it. On days where I could get a ride to the temple or whatnot, I just physically couldn't do it. I either had too much pressure in my head, super dizzy, nauseous, my balance was way off, I had too much numbness/tingling or my fatigue just overtook everything. I've been praying so hard for a chance to go do some temple work. I used to go multiple times a week and I missed it so so much! I missed the feelings of peace in the temple. I missed feeling so close to Heavenly Father. Sometimes I would get so upset that I couldn't go and I would feel my faith start to fade. I knew in the back of my mind that everything always happens for a reason. And I knew this was all happening for a reason as well.

The day after my blessing, my good friend and I ran a bunch of errands. Keep in mind, I don't ever do this. It has been a long time since I've been "busy" and ran errands all day. My body has been so weak and exhausted that all I have done is just sat home or laid in bed usually. We decided we were going to the temple that day to do some temple work. I was always nervous before about trying to go, because I had fears of getting more sick while in the temple. I kept letting my fear get the best of me. But that day, I told myself nothing was going to stop me from going to the temple. I needed it. I needed to go and I needed to do temple work. I needed to serve others. As we walked into the temple I immediately felt peace and comfort. I knew I wasn't alone and that I would be okay. There were moments where I felt super hot and faint, but I kept focusing on the reason why I was there and listening to all those incredible words and blessings. I made it through initiatories and felt so excited!! I met back up with my friend, Melissa and then we headed up to the most GORGEOUS room in the Salt Lake Temple. I had never been there before. Only for my sister's sealing. Which was unbelievably amazing. As Melissa and I walked in that room and sat down, I felt that "burning in my bosom". I began to pray and the comfort and peace just kept overwhelming me. My heart was so full of gratitude. I can't express the joy I felt sitting in that room and knowing that I was there. Finally. It had been way too long and all I could think about was that moment in the temple and how nothing else mattered then. Not the disease, not the stresses, the struggles and hardships that have been going on in my life. I just knew I'd be okay and life will get better.

I promised myself that I will do whatever it takes to go to the temple as often as I can. The thought of not being able to go for months just makes me feel sad. I know that as long as I keep my faith and trust in the Lord with all my heart, I can attend the temple more frequently. I also know that this will help in my healing process. It will help me feel more peace, comfort and joy. No matter the circumstances in life, we must always remember how important it is to keep our Heavenly Father close. Pray at all times, give thanks always and we will begin to see ourselves be strengthened. Heavenly Father loves each of us. He is always there for us as long as we allow Him to be there. There is no trial or tribulation that cannot be overcome with the help of Him.

For all of you who are fighting any kind of battle right now, I pray for all of you. I hope you can continue to stay positive and always try to look at the good side of things and know that we are given certain trials for a reason. Sometimes the trials we are given, aren't even for us. They can be for other people. I'd like to think that about my trials. I feel like I've been given these things to help others. To help others strengthen their faith and to help others in their healing process.
*Just remember we can overcome all things*

Loves,

Nicole

My faith

Hi all!

My blog has started to become more of me sharing my testimony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. With everything that has been going on in my life, this is what I turn to. The gospel. My Heavenly Father. Without it, I have no idea how I would survive through the trials in my life. Having the gospel gives me peace, hope and faith for my future. I know that I am never alone. There are times when I feel like nobody understands the pain or ailments that I suffer from, but that is not true. There is one person who will ALWAYS understand our pains, sorrows, sadness, happiness, joys, etc. Jesus Christ. Our Savior. When we feel alone or like nobody understands, all we need to do is turn to Him. He truly knows how we feel and will help us if we just ask.

The last couple days I have been starting to feel a little better. I felt like I've been getting slightly more energized and am able to do a few more things. Although I'm not completely better, I know with all my heart that everything happens for a reason and I will keep progressing.

Simon has been out of town for work and it has definitely been hard not having him here. I'm so used to seeing him every night. However, I still have his brother here and miss Melissa who still stays with me every night. And I am so grateful for that. Tonight I had the great opportunity to go meet with my Branch President to get my temple recommend renewed and get things rolling so I can be sealed to Simon in the Salt Lake City Temple. YAY! While talking with the Branch President and going through the interview process, I felt so much peace and joy. Even though at the moment I was there I felt so sick, I didn't even care. I could feel the spirit so strongly and getting my recommend renewed made me think back to the very first recommend I had before I went through the temple the first time. It brought such joy to my heart. And this time it was even better because now it's to marry the man of my dreams. Before meeting with the President, I have been so concerned that because of my health I have not been able to attend church hardly at all the last 4 months, I was scared I wouldn't be able to get another recommend. During the interview and when the President asked me questions, I knew in my heart that it didn't matter if I couldn't go to church every single Sunday and partake in callings, go to all the meetings, etc. I knew it was okay because these are things that weren't in my control. That I physically wasn't able to go. The Lord knows my intentions and knows that if I was better, I'd be going to church all the time and fulfilling my duties in the gospel. The President told me he felt great about renewing my recommend and he knows I do as much as I can when I can. I felt so grateful. After we finished up, the President gave me a blessing. Because of the trials in my life and the hardships over the last few months, I know my faith has weakened a time or two or more. But for the first time in quite some time, I could feel that this blessing had different meaning that the others I'd been given. I felt the spirit so strongly and knew my Heavenly Father was there comforting me. I know my faith can always improve and tonight I just realized that no matter how rough life gets or how low we get, we can always overcome those things with Him.

I was told I needed to share my testimony every chance I got. So here I am, sharing my testimony to all of you. I guess that is why I felt inspired to write about these topics tonight. I want everyone to know that YOU are loved. You are never alone and you never have to go through anything in life alone. At times it seems like we are alone, but it doesn't have to be that way. And no matter how bad life gets, it's so important to stay positive and to always keep faith. Life is a beautiful gift we have all been given and it's up to us how to use that gift. I hope and pray for all of you who have struggles in life that you will overcome them and have faith. Have faith in yourself and have faith that it will get better.

Love to all,

Nicole


 (For those of you who are not familiar with my faith or who have other religions/beliefs, I welcome/invite you to still follow my blogs.) This is all my personal feelings and about my life.

It's been a while since I have updated my blog. I haven't felt like doing it lately. There has been a lot going on since my last post. Since then, we have become so frustrated with Doctors and what they have said. Simon especially ;) Sometimes I just want to give up and lose hope completely. But I know that by doing that, it will do no good. And I will never get better if I do. I have to always remember that everything happens for a reason and there is a Divine Plan for me and each and every one of you. Trials happen to everyone. Some more than others, some seem harder than others and we don't know why. When it comes down to it, God truly doesn't give us more than we can handle. Even though there are moments when it feels like we can't handle or take anymore, we always seem to overcome it, even if it's for a small moment.

My wonderful fiance, Simon found a Lyme Disease Support Group and went to a meeting a few weeks ago. I wasn't able to go due to being ill. He is an incredible man. He still went without me because he felt like he needed to go. And it's a good thing he listens to those feelings :) While he was at the meeting, he met some great people and one special lady in particular. She is an elderly lady who has recently been cured completely of Lyme. She was so wonderful to share all of her information with Simon so he could give it to me. We called her that night and talked to her for a while. She gave us some great info and gave us names and numbers of who I needed to contact to seek more help. One of the ladies she told us to call said she could help us a lot. I called her the next morning and she said she was able to see me that same night. Simon and I were really excited because we have heard some great success stories. This lady has a Rife Machine. I'm sure most of you aren't familiar with this machine, but it's pretty great. It's a machine that sends frequencies into the body to literally kill the Lyme. She also does energy work and the Emotion Code. As most of you may know, I've been Foot Zoning and have started alternative things a long time ago. After the first treatment with the Rife Machine, I felt different. The pressure in my head started feeling better and I could tell things were changing in my body. After I was all done, I started getting a really bad headache and had the worst body aches/pains. I was totally okay with this. As much as I was hurting, I knew something was working. I woke up the next day and felt slightly more energized.

We have been doing these treatments for the last couple weeks and I have noticed some changes each time. Although there are days where I still feel like I can't even get out of bed, I know I have to keep using the Rife Machine and doing IV treatments that I just started yesterday. They may make me feel like I'm dying, but I know it gets worse before it gets better. And at this point, I know I have to continue doing this because we have tried pretty much everything else And I'm getting married in 20 days!! :) I'm determined to get feeling better for my wedding. I know all of the treatments, people and other methods have been placed in my way for a reason. And I have to remember that even if I don't feel close to 100% now, I feel better than I did over a month ago and that's what keeps me going.

In my last post, I talked about having gratitude. As hard as it may get sometimes, I still have so many things to be grateful for. I don't have my family close to me anymore, which can get really hard sometimes, but I have plenty of loved ones around. I have a wonderful cousin who comes over and zones me often and helps me more than she'll ever know. I have an incredible friend who has changed her entire daily routine and probably her life to help me. Night time is usually the hardest time for me and this girl comes and stays with me every single night to make sure I'm okay. And always makes sure I'm doing okay throughout the day. She took me to my first IV treatment yesterday and I'm so grateful for her and all that she does. Having her stay with me at night has helped me so much. We read scriptures and always have spiritual conversations. I love it. I don't know what I would do without Melissa. I have a super awesome future bro in law who lives with me. One of the reasons he moved in was so I wasn't alone at night. I'm so grateful to have the priesthood in my home and for all that he does as well. And of course, I have my fiance, Simon. This man.. More amazing than he will ever know. I truly don't know what I would do without him. He is so caring and loves me so much. Even on days where I don't look great, feel so crummy I don't even want to talk. He can always make me laugh, whether I'm sick in bed, in the hospital or just having a rough day. He is my world. He's better than the man of my dreams. He comforts me all the time and let's me cry on his shoulder all the time. Everything that goes on can really get to me sometime and it gets to him too. But he's so strong and helps me to be strong too. We really do complete each other and we have an extremely special relationship. He is a true Son of God and I am so blessed to have him in my life. He has one of the biggest hearts ever. I never thought it was possible to have so much love for someone. And he has a wonderful, wonderful family who I am so grateful for!

During our hard times in life, sometimes that's all we focus on. We focus on the negative, the bad, etc. We also forget to count all of our blessings during the hard times. Which is what we really need to focus on more during trials. It's about how well we endure our trials. Endure them well even if it seems we can't. We always have the Lord on our side as long as we let Him be by our side. We have to remember that through all the trials and tribulations, there will be blessings. We have so much to look forward to in life. I'm so grateful for all the blessings I have been given in life and for trials that make me stronger.